Safari Themed Birthday Party

I just received some bad news, my cousin Vinnie the P. is planning my birthday party. This is going to be the most BORING party in the history of the Woodpile. I can just imagine it now, long winded speeches, even longer toasts, champagne instead of beer, and philosophical jokes that will takes hours, if not days, to figure out the punch line.

This is a desperate plea to my loyal fans – I need your best excuses for not showing up to one’s own birthday party.

I am afraid Vinnie anticipated that move. All of social media accounts mysteriously stopped working. So, I haven’t been able to read any of your excellent suggestions. I guess I am stuck going to this party.

Well, I wasn’t expecting Birthday hats. Maybe I can hide under it?

This is interesting … a safari themed Birthday party.

Wow, Godiva sunflower seeds. At least Vinnie has good taste in food.

Just after all the guests arrived, all of the cell phones rang at once. We received an emergency alert, a lion had escaped from the Zoo and had last been spotted heading towards the Woodpile. I have heard lions eat chipmunks as appetizers!

 

We heard rustling in the grass and saw a pair of pointy ears. Was it the lion or Mr. Spock visiting from the Enterprise?

Nope, it was Bugs Bunny on vacation from Disney World.

I climbed to the top of the Woodpile for a better look. But, I didn’t see any danger.

On the way back to the party, I thought I heard a strange animal sound behind me.

Oh @#$%, this looks really bad … RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

Hi folks its me Vinnie. I bet you never thought I could pull off the best practical joke of the century?! Ha, Ha. Do you think I should let poor Chippy know? Nah, no fun in that.

First Chipmunk to Orbit the Moon

My cousin Vinnie the P. spent July binge watching all of the specials on the 50^th anniversary of the Apollo moon landing program. He noticed that dogs, monkeys, humans and even single cell organisms have flown in space but no chipmunks. He applied for a grant to the National Chipmunk Science Foundation on a whim and prayer. He was utterly surprised to get a call telling him a grant for a million sunflower seeds had been approved to send a chipmunk into space.

Vinnie was ecstatic about the news until he realized he didn’t know anything about rocket science. My cousin is not one to back down from a challenge. He bought a bunch of old NASA Saturn rocket technical manuals he found on Ebay and got to work. He scaled it down to chipmunk size (it saved a lot of money on fuel costs).

Recently, we discovered some spies trying to steal Vinnie’s rocket plans. Mom found some discarded chicken wire fencing along the road and built a secured facility for the Woodpile’s Moon program. Within less than a month Vinnie had his first prototype rocket ready for a test launch. I grabbed my camera to document the historic event.

You will notice the colorful paint scheme on the rocket. Vinnie thought the white paint used by NASA lacked imagination.

During a pre-launch check Vinnie discovers a problem: the rockets is leaning at an angle

Vinnie looks very worried about this problem.

 

Vinnie checks under rocket to see what the problem is.

Having discovered the problem he chirps out orders to the engineering team.

Vinnie inspects the repaired rocket

The test flight went well. Vinnie skipped ahead to the manned-flight phase using 

a bigger version of his rocket. How did it go? Well, Vinnie just tweeted this selfie

from the command module.

Squash Garden Problems

Back in late May I transplanted six squash plants from my greenhouse to mom’s yard (with permission of course). Squash seeds are considered a delicacy with us chipmunks. Fights have broken out at the Woodpile farmers market when the supply was low. After a few too many black eyes, I decided I needed to grow my own.

For the first few weeks they barely grew any new leaves. I thought I was doomed. Well, the other day I heard a loud rapping on my burrow door. Mom was standing outside and didn’t look like a happy camper. She “invited” me to check out my squash patch. It had grown just a tiny little bit. Okay, it had completely taken over it its 20 x 20 foot fenced in coral I had built to contain it. Now, it was creeping over and through the fence and threatened to take over the neighborhood including the Woodpile. Not to mention, I also had a half dozen sunflowers growing and three tomato plants (I didn’t plant them. Mom calls them “volunteers”.) Oops. Here comes the Mayor of Woodpile wanting some answers too. As I explained to Mom, the plants were not doing well so I set up an irrigation system – a slow drip line from a keg of Guinness. I didn’t think it would actually work.

Mom and the Mayor talked it over for a few minutes. They decided on a solution. Suffice to say the Woodpile threw the largest keg party in its history. I thought this was going to be the worst day of my life.

This is what happens when you “water” six squash plants with Guinness beer.

Squash plant “escapes” the garden and threatens the Woodpile

Squash plant has even invaded my sunflower patch. You can see the squash blossoms lower down.

Vinnie took this photo of me with this horrified look as the Woodpile got drunk on MY precious keg of Guinness.

 

Then a brilliant and devious plan dawned on me.

The Mayor of the Woodpile had confiscated my drip hoses. So, I had to find a watering can to use. I turned around and there it was … the empty Guinness bottle. Perfect.

My critics at the Woodpile thought this was rather ironic, me having to use an empty Guinness bottle to give my plants boring old water.

I hope my loyal fans can keep a secret. After the first couple of rounds at the keg party, I siphoned off the rest of the keg into my rain barrel. I replaced it with some cheap beer. Looks like I will be having the last laugh.

Well time to “water” my garden.

UPDATE

My garden has been doing so well it has attracted unwanted attention from undesirable wildlife.

 I had to hire a security guard and setup a watch tower.

However, all pollinators are welcome in my garden like hummingbirds

 

and hummingbird moths

Merry & Spitfire's Marvelous Adventure

Chippy has become obsessed with his garden plot and ignoring all his friends. Spitfire and myself, Merry, have been bored hanging around the Woodpile. I overheard Mom planning a trip to tour the U.S. Coast Guard Cutter Eagle which was participating in Sail Portsmouth 2019 event. It sounded like the perfect adventure. We packed our bags along with lots of snacks and stowed away in Mom’s purse.

We didn’t count on the fact security was really tight and there was a bag check for all visitors. We were “discovered”. After explaining our situation, the Coast Guard personal admired our initiative and adventurous spirit. (I also think it helped when we offered to write about our experiences on Chippy’s famous blog.)

The Eagle is a 295 foot long three masted tall ship. It was built in 1936 for the German Navy and acquired by the U.S. at the end of WWII as war reparations. It takes a permanent crew of 57 to run the ship. The Coast Guard uses the ship for training cadets enrolled in its Officer Candidate School.

Various signs throughout the tour promoted the values of the Coast Guard and were aimed at recruiting new candidates. Spitfire and myself decided to join the Coast Guard. It sounded like a lot more fun than hanging around the Woodpile listening to Chippy drone on for hours about the best way to care for squash plants.

 

This block and tackle matches my own wood tone.

Here is an example of how these block and tackles are used.

Hmmm, they don’t seem to have any critter size life rings onboard.

It takes a lot of crewmen to steer the boat. I wonder if they have a minimum height requirement?

We have to learn what? What all these ropes do.

 … and raise these heavy sails

… by pulling on these ropes thicker than our bodies

 

We decided to make a quick exit through the port holes.

As we were going AWOL, we came across this futuristic craft called the Ghost. The manufacturer was looking for some test pilots. We offered to work for #50 of sunflower seeds per day ($28) and were hired on the spot.

Petunia

The other week I was visiting my distant cousin, Freddie Green Paws,  at the Tupper Hill Norcross Wildlife Sanctuary in Wales, Mass. (Open 9-4pm  Tues through Sat.) He is a gardener there. He gave me a tour of some of their public trails that go through the various different plant habitat zones. The woodland garden has a meandering stream through it. There is nice boardwalk so you don’t get your paws wet. The flowers were amazing.

He introduced me to Petunia who supervises the Rose Garden. Her office is a hollow in a tree overlooking the garden. She can see every nook and cranny in the place.

Woodland garden with trails and bridge

Boardwalk through wetlands habitat

The flowers are gorgeous

Great photo opportunities

Petunia is ever watchful

I think one of the staff missed a weed

Time for a back scratch

“Is that the famous blogger Chippy in my garden?”

“Chippy, make sure you get a shot of my best side, my prize winning tail.”

Petunia relaxes rests after an “exhausting” photo shoot for my blog. I took fifty photos before I got a picture of her tail which was “satisfactory”