Joy Ride

As you know I bought a human size car. In my excitement, I didn’t quite think my plan completely through. As one observant blog follower asked, how do I plan on driving it when I can’t even see over the dashboard. Okay, that is just a tiny, minor, inconsequential problem. Let’s break the problem down into its key components: (1) steering, (2) gas & brake pedals (3) shifter, and (4) navigator. Obviously, I am too small for my paws to reach the petals and shifter while steering. What’s a chipmunk going do? My solution is to get a drink at the tavern. You are probably asking how is getting drunk going to fix the problem? Watch and learn …

At the Blackbird Tavern, I said in a loud voice “Attention my fellow Woodpile critters, I have an important announcement. How many of you want to see the world beyond the Woodpile? How many of you want to take what the humans call a “Joy Ride”? Guess what, it won’t cost you one sunflower seed.”

My drinking buddies said “sounds exciting”, “where do I sign up”, “I like free stuff” … and one smart paw asked “what is the catch?” I whispered in his ear that his wife wanted him home for dinner with the kids or else … he left in hurry. Too many questions will ruin my plan.

Okay everyone lets check out my new “set of wheels”.

“Joy Riding” is a team sport. I need a navigator (sort like a quarterback) who sits on the dash and calls the plays – “steer left”, “steer right”, “hit the brakes”. I need a strong brakeman to work the pedals. I will be the coach and “steer” the team in the right direction. Now, I just need someone to handle the shifter.

There are a couple of rules we need to follow: (1) No drinking and driving (2) Not everyone gets a window view. One of my drinking buddies said, “Chippy, you never mentioned there was a catch to this Joy Ride of yours.” We can talk about that later. Lets rev up the engine.

 I had two of my buddies wanting to be the quarterback or navigator: Freddie the Chipmunk and Lucky the Spider. Freddie said “Please, please pick me.”

Then to prove his skills, he challenged Lucky to a “steering” contest

Freddie “What do you mean you picked the Lucky the Spider over me?”  

Chippy “Well, she has more eyes than you do.”

“Lets give it some gas”

“I see something in the road lets give the brakes a soft touch.”

“Hey that is Bushy the Squirrel in the road, hit the brakes hard!”

I am real natural at this steering business

Vinnie, time to shift into the next gear.

“Daddy, can we stop, I need to use the restroom.” The joys of taking the family on a “Joy Ride.”